Holidays, particularly Thanksgiving and Christmas, are often difficult for many. Family gatherings are known for bringing up painful memories – from those who never meshed well in close quarters – to heated discussions which arise over allocation of meal preparation duties – to old sibling rivalries that come to life once again. And then there’s the infamous “Drunk Uncle” that’s become a beloved Saturday Night Live character.
When one reaches “that certain age” when parents, aunts and uncles have long passed, these holidays can easily become even more painful and complicated to navigate. Old traditions are suddenly gone, as are the places and people we remember – fondly or not. Those with chronic illnesses face additional challenges: the inability to participate in many normal activities, to finding ourselves alone, as friends – who’ve “disappeared” somewhere along our path to diagnose(s) are no longer present, painfully triggering our inability to feel whole or connected. Even if I was invited to the round of events and holiday parties of years past, I would find it difficult to meet new people. The “what do you do” question that’s regularly posed gets quickly dismissed when one responds “I’m disabled.” Or, “I used to be a …” My partner, in an effort to be helpful, usually responds for me, quickly stating “He’s retired.” Even though it’s been more than 10 years since I’ve been able to work, I still cringe at the question, and even the “retired” response evokes a level of anxiety that only those chronically ill or disabled can truly appreciate.
After the New Year is rung in by Times Square revelers, one imagines that holiday angst would dissipate as quickly as it arrived. Perhaps in a perfect world, certainly not in a year in which the entire country is uneasy, waiting for a new President to be sworn in. A President, who in the kindest of terms, is a bit reactive, unevolved and inexperienced in the world of international politics. Meryl Streep said it best during her Golden Globe Lifetime Achievement speech last evening, during which she defended the fair treatment of everyone, how violence only brings more violence, the importance of cross-cultural efforts to demonstrate human existence through the art of film, and that we all have a role in protecting the media, as they are truly the purveyors of a truth that will not be forthcoming from our new administration. If you have a moment, I suggest you Google Ms. Streep’s speech. I’m sure You Tube (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NxyGmyEby40) and other sites will have posted it in its entirety. I wish you all a healthy, productive and positive 2017.
